Salvation Army Santa

I wanted to get you a Christmas present

Worth of your cultivated taste

Something so exquisite, it would show you how I feel,

Put a smile on baby Jesus’ face

But it’s a deep recession Christmas, and I am out of work

The Salvation Army Santa rings his bell

Just for one split second, I imagine rolling him

Then I laugh and wish his whole endeavor well

Time goes screaming by like a hyena on a luge

The 21st will be the darkest day this year

Hence the days go brighter for the luckless and the charmed

In the meantime, let us raise a glass of cheer

A gift within my means with be a pittance

Fifth of bourbon from the bottom shelf

This song will have to be your Christmas present

And you’ll just have to love me for myself